November 11th, 2006


Bedroom Day

Brain zaps again!!  They seem to show up on day 4 of total withdrawal of all SSRI's.  As I have no responsibilties I am staying in my bedroom with mimimum stimulation and will hopefully not have to take a pill, actually a very small bit of a pill is what it is, hardly bigger than the head of a pin... It blows my mind that such a minute amount of chemical could "blow my mind" the way it does. 

FUCK BIG PHARMA... !!! Don't let it FUCK YOU!!

Enough of that... moving right along to my grasp of today's draw which I did early this morning.   I used the spread that was posted on a group recently, 3 cards.. Energy, Challenge, Gift.. and received:  Star, 3 of Pents, 5 of Cups - until only a few moments ago I was clueless as to the manner in which the 5 of Cups might present itself as my gift.. And, then my daughter came home, and I was pretty bummed out to hear that she wasn't going to be around tonight, as she has to babysit for her sister's children tonight.  

It is only now that I realize the gift of the 5 of Cups.  Though I did suffer loss, i.e. the loss of my daughter and granddaughter's companionship tonight, yet the gift is the benefit I will garner from remaining alone in my quiet dark
bedroom sipping tea :)

I am grateful for quiet afternoons spent alone in my bedroom.

I am grateful for the birds who visit the tree outside my bedroom.

I am grateful that the pain in my neck is easing a bit.